Food for thought: Every time you “splonch”, someone gets shot with a harpoon gun.
Every time you “taf”, three people get gout.
Every time you neither “splonch” nor “taf”, there is a volcanic eruption in the past, destroying the island of Krakatoa, because of you.
Think about it. This changes everything. You can change everything. Start to “splonch” and “taf” to save the island of Krakatoa and cause some deaths and gouts, because in the long run, it's worth it?